AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER’S LIFE–read it ………..

ONE BEDROOM FLAT… AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER’S LIFE… – A Bitter Reality

As the dream of most parents I had acquired a degree in Software Engineer and joined a company based in

USA, the land of braves and
opportunity. When I arrived in the

USA, it was as if a dream had come true.

Here at last I was in the place where I want to be. I decided I would be staying in this country for about Five years in which time I would
have earned enough money to settle down in

India.

My father was a government employee and after his retirement, the only asset he could acquire was a decent one bedroom flat. I wanted
to do some thing more than him. I started feeling homesick and lonely as the time passed. I used to call home and speak to my parents every
week using cheap international phone cards. Two years passed, two years of Burgers at McDonald’s and pizzas and discos and 2 years
watching the foreign exchange rate getting happy whenever the Rupee value went down.

Finally I decided to get married. Told my parents that I have only 10 days of holidays and everything must be done within these 10 days. I
got my ticket booked in the cheapest flight. Was jubilant and was actually enjoying hopping for gifts for all my friends back home.If I
miss anyone then there will be talks. After reaching home I spent home one week going through all the photographs of girls and as the
time was getting shorter I was forced to select one candidate.

In-laws told me,to my surprise, that I would have to get married in 2-3 days, as I will not get anymore holidays. After the marriage, it
was time to return to

USA, after giving some money to my parents and telling the neighbors to look after them, we returned to

USA.

My wife enjoyed this country for about two months and then she started feeling lonely. The frequency of calling

India increased to
twice in a week sometimes 3 times a week. Our savings started diminishing. After two more years we started to have kids. Two lovely
kids, a boy and a girl,were gifted to us by the almighty. Every time I spoke to my parents, they asked me to come to

India so that they
can see their grand-children.

Every year I decide to go to

India . But part work part monetary conditions prevented it. Years went by and visiting

India was a
distant dream. Then suddenly one day I got a message that my parents were seriously sick. I tried but I couldn’t get any holidays and thus
could not go to

India.

The next message I got was my parents had passed away and as there was no one to do the last rights the society members had done
whatever they could. I was depressed. My parents had passed away without seeing their grand children.

After couple more years passed away, much to my children’s dislike and my wife’s joy we returned to

India to settle down. I started to
look for a suitable property, but to my dismay my savings were short and the property prices had gone up during all these years. I had to
return to the

USA.

My wife refused to come back with me and my children refused to stay in

India . My 2 children and I returned to

USA after promising my wife
I would be back for good after two years. Time passed by, my daughter decided to get married to an American and my son was happy living in

USA . I decided that had enough and wound-up every thing and returned to

India. I had just enough money to buy a decent 02 bedroom flat in a well-developed locality. Now I am 60 years old and the only time I go out of the flat is for the routine visit to the nearby temple. My faithful wife has also left me and
gone to the holy abode.

Sometimes I wondered was it worth all this? My father, even after staying in

India, had a house to his name and I too have the same
nothing more. I lost my parents and children for just ONE EXTRA BEDROOM.

Looking out from the window I see a lot of children dancing. This damned cable TV has spoiled our new generation and these children are
losing their values and culture because of it. I get occasional cars from my children asking I am alright. Well at least they remember me.

Now perhaps after I die it will be the neighbors again who will be performing my last rights, God Bless them. But the question still
remains ‘was all this worth it?’

I am still searching for an answer…………….!!!!

— By an Indian SE who was in US.

AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER’S LIFE–read it ………..

ONE BEDROOM FLAT… AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER’S LIFE… – A Bitter Reality

As the dream of most parents I had acquired a degree in Software Engineer and joined a company based in

USA, the land of braves and
opportunity. When I arrived in the

USA, it was as if a dream had come true.

Here at last I was in the place where I want to be. I decided I would be staying in this country for about Five years in which time I would
have earned enough money to settle down in

India.

My father was a government employee and after his retirement, the only asset he could acquire was a decent one bedroom flat. I wanted
to do some thing more than him. I started feeling homesick and lonely as the time passed. I used to call home and speak to my parents every
week using cheap international phone cards. Two years passed, two years of Burgers at McDonald’s and pizzas and discos and 2 years
watching the foreign exchange rate getting happy whenever the Rupee value went down.

Finally I decided to get married. Told my parents that I have only 10 days of holidays and everything must be done within these 10 days. I
got my ticket booked in the cheapest flight. Was jubilant and was actually enjoying hopping for gifts for all my friends back home.If I
miss anyone then there will be talks. After reaching home I spent home one week going through all the photographs of girls and as the
time was getting shorter I was forced to select one candidate.

In-laws told me,to my surprise, that I would have to get married in 2-3 days, as I will not get anymore holidays. After the marriage, it
was time to return to

USA, after giving some money to my parents and telling the neighbors to look after them, we returned to

USA.

My wife enjoyed this country for about two months and then she started feeling lonely. The frequency of calling

India increased to
twice in a week sometimes 3 times a week. Our savings started diminishing. After two more years we started to have kids. Two lovely
kids, a boy and a girl,were gifted to us by the almighty. Every time I spoke to my parents, they asked me to come to

India so that they
can see their grand-children.

Every year I decide to go to

India . But part work part monetary conditions prevented it. Years went by and visiting

India was a
distant dream. Then suddenly one day I got a message that my parents were seriously sick. I tried but I couldn’t get any holidays and thus
could not go to

India.

The next message I got was my parents had passed away and as there was no one to do the last rights the society members had done
whatever they could. I was depressed. My parents had passed away without seeing their grand children.

After couple more years passed away, much to my children’s dislike and my wife’s joy we returned to

India to settle down. I started to
look for a suitable property, but to my dismay my savings were short and the property prices had gone up during all these years. I had to
return to the

USA.

My wife refused to come back with me and my children refused to stay in

India . My 2 children and I returned to

USA after promising my wife
I would be back for good after two years. Time passed by, my daughter decided to get married to an American and my son was happy living in

USA . I decided that had enough and wound-up every thing and returned to

India. I had just enough money to buy a decent 02 bedroom flat in a well-developed locality. Now I am 60 years old and the only time I go out of the flat is for the routine visit to the nearby temple. My faithful wife has also left me and
gone to the holy abode.

Sometimes I wondered was it worth all this? My father, even after staying in

India, had a house to his name and I too have the same
nothing more. I lost my parents and children for just ONE EXTRA BEDROOM.

Looking out from the window I see a lot of children dancing. This damned cable TV has spoiled our new generation and these children are
losing their values and culture because of it. I get occasional cars from my children asking I am alright. Well at least they remember me.

Now perhaps after I die it will be the neighbors again who will be performing my last rights, God Bless them. But the question still
remains ‘was all this worth it?’

I am still searching for an answer…………….!!!!

— By an Indian SE who was in US.

AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER’S LIFE–read it ………..

AN INDIAN SOFTWARE ENGINEER’S LIFE–read it ………..

Ten Principles for Total Peace of Mind

Ten Principles for Total Peace of Mind:

1. Do Not Interfere In Others’ Business Unless Asked.

Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others’ affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right  direction, our direction. This thinking denies the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God.. God has created each one of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act in exactly the same way. All men or women act the way they do because God within them prompts them that way. Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.

2. Forgive And Forget.

This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop ill feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us. We nurture grievances. This in turn results in loss of sleep, development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by constantly remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Life is too short to waste in such trifles. Forgive, Forget, and march on. Love flourishes in giving and forgiving.

3. Do Not Crave For Recognition.

This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody without selfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in power, but no sooner than you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and will start finding faults in you. Why do you wish to kill yourself in striving for their recognition? Their recognition is not worth the aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely.

4. Do Not Be Jealous.

We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind. You know that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but sometimes they get promotions; you do not. You started a business several years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like these in everyday life. Should you be jealous? No. Remember everybody’s life is shaped by his/her destiny, which has now become his/her reality. If you are destined to be rich, nothing in the world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one can help you either. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not get you anywhere; it will only take away your peace of mind.

5. Change Yourself According To The Environment.

If you try to change the environment single-handedly, the chances are you will fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you, will mysteriously change and seem congenial and harmonious.

6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured.

This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage. Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and accidents that are beyond our control. If we cannot control them or change them, we must learn to put up with these things. We must learn to endure them cheerfully. Believe in yourself and you will gain in terms of patience, inner strength and will power.

7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew.

This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations.. Why take on additional loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your external activities. Reduce your material engagements and spend time in prayer, introspection and meditation. This will reduce those thoughts in your mind that make you restless. Uncluttered mind will produce greater peace of mind.

8. Meditate Regularly.

Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it yourself. If you meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend to become peaceful during the remaining twenty-three and half-hours. Your mind will not be easily disturbed as it was before. You would benefit by gradually increasing the period of daily meditation. You may think that this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this will increase your efficiency and you will be able to produce better results in less time.

9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant.

An empty mind is the devil’s workshop. All evil actions start in the vacant mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your interest. You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind. Your hobby, like social work or religious work, may not always earn you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement. Even when you are resting physically, occupy yourself in healthy reading or mental chanting of God’s name.

10. Do Not Procrastinate And Never Regret.

Do not waste time in protracted wondering ” Should I or shouldn’t I?” Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future happenings. Value your time and do the things that need to be done. It does not matter if you fail the first time. You can learn from your mistakes and succeed the next time. Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the past. DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened was destined to happen only that way. Why cry over spilt milk?

A lesson for LIFE…

A Lesson for LIFE A boy was born to a couple after eleven years of marriage. They were a loving couple and the boy was the apple of their eyes. When the boy was around two years old, one morning the husband saw a medicine bottle open. He was late for work so he asked the wife to cap the bottle and keep it in the cupboard. The mother, preoccupied in the kitchen, totally forgot the matter.  The boy saw the bottle and playfully went to the bottle and, fascinated with its color, drank it all. It happened to be a poisonous medicine meant for adults in small dosages. When the child collapsed, the mother hurried him to the hospital, where he died. The mother was stunned. She was terrified how to face her husband.  When the distraught father came to the hospital and saw the dead child, he looked at his wife and uttered just four words.  What do you think were the four words?      ……………………   ………………   ………………   ………….   …………   ……..   …   …   …   …   …   …    The husband just said “I Love You Darling”  The husband’s totally unexpected reaction is proactive behavior. The child is dead. He can never be brought back to life. There is no point in finding fault with the mother. Besides, if only he have taken time to keep the bottle away, this will not have happened. No point in attaching blame. She had also lost her only child. What she needed at that moment was consolation and sympathy from the husband. That is what he gave her. Sometimes we spend time asking who is responsible or who to blame, whether in a relationship, in a job or with the people we know. We miss out some warmth in human relationship in giving each other support. After all, shouldn’t forgiving someone we love be the easiest thing in the world to do? Treasure what you have. Don’t multiply pain, anguish and suffering by holding on to forgiveness. If everyone can look at life with this kind of perspective, there would be much fewer problems in the world.  Take off all your envies, jealousies, unwillingness to forgive, selfishness, and fears and you will find things are actually not as difficult as you think. 

Preserve Smile, Love and Humanity!